Aneshka's useless rants

It must have been the lunar eclipse or I might be losing my sanity. Just today, I absentmindedly forgot an appointment, she texted me minutes before that she's already on the way. It completely slipped my mind and just realized it when I was already on-board the jeepney (Thank God! I was just near when she reminded me of our appointment.). So I just jumped off the jeepney murmuring about a forgotten thing so I wouldn't be obliged to pay the fare (Am I bad or what?).

I absentmindedly flagged for a taxi when my intention was to flag a jeepney. Where the hell is my mind going? Darn! To top this off, a series of bad luck was on my side i.e. no stack in Sara Lee, no book in national bookstore, closed Cagnaan Shop and forgotten money when I was suppose to do the grocery. What the hell is wrong with my sanity now??? I'm blaming this on the lunar eclipse because I simply won't accept that I am starting to get crazy, teehee!

I'm a so-so software developer, a so-so swimmer, a so-so artist. Does that mean I'm a so-so person? Never been good with something that's why up until now I have not decided what I really want because I am just so-so in everything I could think of.

Sept. 23 - 30, 7 + 30 + 26..... 63 days before I can finally see him. Let me see, that was June 21 when we've last seen each other so that makes it 158 days. uhum, that long? It is to date the longest time we've been away from each other. To add insult to injury, the last time we've had a decent conversation was last aug. 11, that was more than a month ago. I guess I'll just have to make do with occasional morning and weekend chats since long distance calls are quite costly.

I once thought that I would die of boredom when he'd be away but I thought otherwise, friends left and right began inviting me and not weekend would go without me going out. My mother would tease me of always not being at home and that bride-to-be's should not go out often because an accident might happen. huh?
Needless to say, I enjoyed my so-so single life but there are just times like today for instance when I would wish for someone to hold my hand and hug me tight.

Ahh...being single can sometimes be a blessing or a curse.

No topic to post. Just wanna blab. Hay! I had once of those wedding nightmares AGAIN for the 'nth time. Well, here is what I can remember…

......... OMG! It's 3P.M., what? I still have no make-up on…. what the???? (In panic mode..) Shouting "Call Torib...Call Torib". Ring... Ring.... Hello, could you do my make-up for me?
Torib-> You need to have a trial make-up first.
Me-> No! No! I want you to go here now ...... flailing my arms and sobbing at the same time.

.....Switch to another scene me in a gown holding my bouquet, “what is wrong with my bouquet??? I don’t want red calla flowers… and I why are there only six pieces and they are all wilting.

….Another scene again, in my gown holding the wilted bouquet, “What time is it?….” Looking at the watch… “5:00 PM but … but ….but….my wedding is at 3:00 PM… why?.. why?..why?….sobbing again!”


Arggh… so okay, I still have so many apprehensions. I’m a light sleeper so I dream a lot, whatever apprehensions I have I dream about it. I dream before an exam, I dream before a job interview, I dream …. I dream….dream? not really I call it a nightmare but hey there were times that I dreamt of nailing it but that’s too rare. I have star-studded dreams too. I dreamt of Lea Salonga being rape. I dreamt of other stars but I can’t recall who for now. I also dreamt of other people i.e. family members, officemates, friends. So watch out I might me dreaming ‘bout you. (Nanghadlok hehehe).

Two unfinished blogs and I'm writing one again. Haven't I learned my lesson yet?

Well I just need to holler out 'cause I'm soo freakin' stressed out! 3 months to go and I still have nothing concrete for the wedding. I don't have any concrete suppliers and the only thing I'm sure of is my venue and church, now how about that? The entourage hmm not yet final, the souvenir not yet bought, the misalette .. have to buy the paper and cutter and start the cutting, invitations ... how am I suppose to start with this if my entourage is not yet final?…..the videographer? No supplier yet… the entourage gowns haven’t bought the telas yet….the audiovisual presentation, haven’t finished scanning yet, the cake haven’t booked one yet, the make-up … still looking, the birth certificate damn it! I have to go to NSO because my dear readers the government is so inefficient (they have no record of it). I could just blab on and on but the more I blab the more I realize that I have so many freakin’ things to do!

On top of the wedding preparations, there is the cheerdance, swimming competition, walang kamatayang office work and I have to study technical stuffs. I don’t even have peace of mind because I have an on-going rift with my mother regarding the make-up artist. When we talk about this topic our tempers would just flare up that one snap and both of us would burst into flames.

Arggghh! Ack! I’m hyperventilating, okay breath in.. breath out… breath in …breath out.

# posted by aneshka |