Toilet Humor

Originally posted on  6/24/2005 02:43:00 AM 

Just this morning, I felt the urge to... you know relieve myself (kalibangon in bisaya).

So ala article ni. Obvious ba na wala akong ginagawa hehehe.

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Ever had the urge to relieve yourself during office hours? I, for one would definitely hate doing this but if nature really calls then here are some steps to do the dreaded thing.

1. Pretend that you are going somewhere far i.e. like going to the farthest copier or going to the pantry to wash your mug.
2. Make sure that only a few know the existence of the toilet you’ll be using. The best places are usually those farthest away from your office or cubicle; at least you don’t know or are not close to the people there.
3. Go to the farthest toilet cubicle.
4. Make sure that the cubicle has a lot of tissue or you brought tissue with you. To be sure, just bring your mug. I still think that water is the best “dirt” cleaner.
5. If you are bringing a mug, fill it up with water
6. Sit down and do your thing.
7. If someone enters, smell the odor emanating from the bowl. Flush if the smell is quite obvious.
8. Continue doing the deed.
9. Wait until the CR is empty
10. If it’s not possible and you are using “the mug”, wait for the person to use the drier then wash your ass. Of course, using the tissue would be easier as you are worry-free about the sound of the water hitting the bowl.
11. Flush not once but thrice.
12. If you have perfume, spray a little.
13. Get out of the cube and pretend that nothing happened.
14. Wash your hands
15. and then go back to your work place.
16. If someone looks at you suspiciously, pretend that you did not see him or her.
17. Don’t forget to bring notes from the make-believe meeting or copies from the copier.